Leaving Storybrooke
Redemption. That was a word coined for those who wished to make amends for their wretched mistakes.
Regina knew much about making mistakes. She could recall every flaw and error that made her who she was. She brought lives to an untimely end, tore countless families apart, and shattered the happiness and dreams of anyone who dared to even look at her the wrong way. How could someone redeem themselves when they had earned the title of Evil Queen?
She pondered that thought as she penned a letter to Henry. He was the one ray of hope that pierced the veil of a life filled with darkness. He was the one truly good thing she had done. She may not have carried him in her womb, or even given birth to him, but she loved him more than anything. She'd go to the ends of the Earth to ensure his happiness. Little did Henry know that by bringing Emma to Storybrooke, he had unraveled her only joy in the world. She didn't care that the townspeople reclaimed their identities and despised her, nor did she hesitate much when she was compelled by Henry to change her evil ways, but what killed her was Henry's attachment to Emma.
It was natural for Regina to be envious of the bond Henry and Emma had, but it was more than just jealousy. With Killian and Emma as a couple, it provided Henry with a perfect, loving family. She didn't dare to express how she felt, as it was a sign of weakness, but the thought of Henry no longer needing her unraveled her to the core. What was her purpose in life if not to be Henry's mother? She had worked so hard to finally gain the trust of those she had betrayed and wronged, but none of that meant anything if Henry no longer required her presence. This is why she was writing a letter to her son as she sat in her office that once symbolized a modern day throne when she was still Mayor of Storybrooke. The letter disclosed how irrational it was for her to feel jealously over Emma and Killian. She knew she was Henry's mother in her own regard, but even though she knew this and loved Henry tremendously, she stated to her son how she needed to find a purpose in her life outside of motherhood if she was to ever genuinely be fulfilled. By sealing the letter in the envelope, she had sealed her own fate... She was leaving.
The wind howled in the night as she slowly sauntered out of her office and along the sidewalks of town. Her dark orbs relished every sight she took in, for she didn't know how long it would be until she'd set foot in Storybrooke again. The streetlights and bright stars above her illuminated her path as she reached the town line. Breathing in the cold air deeply as she tried to find enough courage to leave the place she had known as home for so many endless years.
Redemption. She shook her head in disgust. Redemption had allowed for another woman to nestle herself into her son's life. Seeking redemption gave Emma the status of a mother even though it was Regina who raised and endlessly loved Henry through every second of his waking life. Redemption was what belittled her status as Mayor and Queen and caused the townspeople to walk all over her and look at her with disgust for all her past mistakes.
Redemption; how cruel it was to her.